Swooning

The Bell is Ringing

The Bell is Ringing: Swoon 40

I loved Little House on the Prairie. I was a Half-Pint wannabe. I had no time for Mary, she had the gorgeous blonde hair, perfect blue eyes, and tall lean figure. Mary was smart, beautiful, and always seemed to make the right decision. Nope. I wanted to be Half-Pint, she had sass, she was always ready to roll up her selves and pitch in, she defended the weak and noticed the outcasts, and she called out Nellie, yet still had empathy for her. She also made tons of mistakes, she struggled to keep her mouth shut, had trouble with school work, was stubborn and pigheaded, and she often stepped out of her place. I am Half-Pint.

My swooning of Little House was not just about Laura. I adored Walnut Grove, I loved that everyone worked together for the greater good (well, the never seen before guest star, Nellie, and Mrs. Oleson might need some convincing, but they always came around). It gave me such comfort that no matter what…fire, flu, mice, those pesky locusts…that when that church bell would ring, the town would come together and solve the problem. So soothing.

The first time I saw the movie Witness I had an aha moment… I decided if my life in NYC working as a designer and my relationship with Greg went south…so would I…to Amish country. It was the closest thing to Little House on the Prairie. Ring that bell and hundreds of men in black pants, white shirts, and wacky hats would appear over the hills ready to help. The boys would work while the women were preparing a glorious meal, and all would share in a community dinner when done. No matter the depth of the issue…a barn needing to be raised or big city crooks wielding guns in the grain silo…the community came out to help when they heard that bell.

There is a bell ringing right now, and if people would stop fighting and finger pointing we would all hear it. This bell is telling us all to stay home. Listen to scientists. Respect hospital workers and those trying to keep us safe. It is a brilliant time to catch up on the oldies, I see some Brady Bunch in my future, any guess who I wanted to be?

Thinking Out of the Box

Thinking Out of the Box: Swoon 39

How does one teach high school students ceramics through a daily email and video lesson… when the kids have no clay, glazes, wheels, or kilns at their homes? They rename the class sculpture and have their students use items around their homes to create 3D objects, ask them to photograph their results, and wait to see what happens. Today a parent posted her high schooler’s solution to the assignment “create a color wheel out of household items”, with a lovely thank you to my art teacher husband. This kid hit it out of the park. They used their ability to think, to see, and to design… to create a thing of beauty and happiness for everyone reading her mom’s post. Joy.

Why do I love artists? It’s a good question. They are fickle, moody, very hard on themselves, impatient, and needy. They are also the people you WANT around in a pandemic. They have the ability to think out of the box.

The musical director (I think that is his title) for Madison Square Garden lives in our town. He is quiet and lovely, understated, you would never know he is the guy running the show and playing for the MSG sporting games you watch on tv. His wife (also a brilliant artist) has been posting clips of him performing one song each night. He is technically beyond anything I have ever heard, but it is the unique energy and soul that is just overwhelming. He creates another world in three minutes… a song you thought you knew becomes something else. It is magic.

I was once working with a high schooler on a play… he was helping me rig a life size Beast puppet (Beauty and the Beast). It needed to rise above the audience and magically change into the live prince. We are talking a high school play, and not Broadway, our town goes a little over the top with plays. I created the puppet with old stuff from around my house, wire, bubble wrap (very much like muscle), boxes, clothing supplied by the costume team, and a wig. My high school helper looked at the life size Beast before him and said, how did you learn how to make this (this was pre youtube tutorials for “how to make a life size Beast puppet”). My answer, I went to art school, we are taught that there are millions of solutions for every problem. A class of 20 kids will have to come up with 80 solutions, different solutions. This kid was going to be valedictorian and this kid’s mind was blown. He had never thought of artists as smart. He learned something.

Currently artists are creating new businesses, 3D printing masks for hospitals, figuring out how to make ventilators work on numerous people at a time, programming apps, teaching online classes, sharing music, keeping children happy… they are doers, they are makers, they are the sunshine in a storm. Artists think out of the box and create where there was nothing before. Swoon.

HS Distance Learning Assignment: Create a color wheel from household items. Brilliant student solution. Swoon.

Undies on the Outside

Undies on the Outside: Swoon 38

When my kids were little every day was dress up day. They were Muppets and superheroes, they were brides, princesses, ninjas, cowgirls, Star Wars characters, and pirates… Every. Single. Day.

One house rule was when dressing as Superman, if we were leaving the apartment, one must wear the red undies UNDER the blue long johns. Getting dressed Jacob would ask are we going out, can the undies be on the outside? This rule made no sense to him, why would there BE red undies if everyone was not supposed to SEE them? My house. My rules. And now I look back and say, what on earth was I thinking?

Rules are important. One should probably not wear tightie whities over their jeans, but while being Superman one must always wear the red undies on top of the blue leggings. I apologize Jacob. I was 100% wrong.

We are currently in a period of all rules being thrown out the window. Everyone is trying to do the best they can… kids adjusting to a new reality, parents trying to keep their families safe, people learning to work from home or deal with the loss of work, the elderly feeling isolated by leaders who find them disposable… it is pretty hard.

Now is the time for undies on the outside… live the life that keeps you safe, but allows you to experience joy. Do the best you can with schedules but make time for walks, chats with family and friends, and something joyous every day. Go find some flowers blooming, watch some birds from a park bench, fill your windows with bright drawings, chalk your sidewalk… swoon.

Moving to the burbs meant a rule change… undies on the outside were allowed in the backyard. Score.

A Time to Swoon

A Time to Swoon: Swoon 37

I did not swoon yesterday, swooning is kind of hard these days. It seems kind of forced and fake. I just went about my day, and there were no real sparks, so I did not write. Last night I had a video presentation for a PSA project that local students are developing with a hospital I work for. I am just the art director/designer, the kids come up with a slogan, sketch, and then an illustrator and I create a campaign based on their ideas. Presenting sketches to a bunch of high schoolers that have been doing school work all day while in quarantine seemed like it might be challenging.

It was amazing. These kids were so intelligent and kind in their thoughts, constructive criticism, and views. They were asked how they were doing with the whole social distancing and quarantine situation… their responses: I am getting more work done, I am sleeping more and less tired, it is nice to be with my family, it is going well. Not one negative comment. It was an eye opening experience. What fantastic humans.

So I am going to jump on their positive bandwagon…

Things that currently make me swoon: cooking dinner for my family, daily phone calls and video chats with my son, saying I love you more, playing cards with the family after dinner, video game nights, checking in on my clients well being before getting into the work thing, learning about how diseases spread and how we can do better next time, getting excited about a vegetable garden, donating to those in need, seeing friends create colorful masks for hospital workers, thanking helpers like cashiers and garbage collectors who are usually ignored, not caring that my pedicure stinks, hearing how fun delivering nanny-made bread (while still social distancing) to my brothers family was, listening to music, realizing that cleaning the bathroom, counters, and door knobs daily is not a big deal, hearing how people are recovering slowly after being hit, seeing people sharing masks and vitamins and cheese (!) via social media and safe curbside deliveries, having video meetings in my pjs and lipstick, calling my friend who is a cook with ingredients in my fridge and having her give me a recipe on the spot, having fun swaps with neighbors and keeping kids excited to wake up and see what goodness is outside their door, picking which slippers I will wear for the day, introducing little kids to shrinky dinks, texts and daily check ins with friends, joining prayer chains for those who are very sick, dancing, going gray…like really really gray, video church and coffee hour, local small businesses reaching out to help others via video lessons and curbside deliveries, spending less on crap and take out, listening to the giggles from my husbands after school art class on zoom as I type this, smelling the food my daughter is cooking for dinner, seeing the beautiful day and knowing I can go for a walk, watching how different people cope and learning from their beautiful skills, my governor and Brian Lehrer, the sun, chatting with neighbors from 10 feet away, checking in on my elderly friends and hearing they are fine, hearing kids laughing and screaming outside my window, cuddling with my pets, knowing my family near and far is safe, as of now… swoon.

I would love if you left comments about what makes you swoon during this time. It helps to know people are ok. I hope you all are ok.

Crappy pedicure and cute slipper choices.

Bath Time

Bath Time: Swoon 36

When I was young I loved bath time. We had a huge tub, probably from the 40s, before water conservation was even a thought. At some point glass walls and a sliding door were added, creating an enclosure. We would fill the tub to the brim, and close the door, creating a tank. This gave us the ability to splash, “swim”, and play for hours on end. My brother and I were pretty small kids, we could circle the tub like sharks in an aquarium, we would play tub basketball…shooting those grocery store bright rubber balls over the top, our mom collecting them and shooting them back in the tank. It was our own indoor pool. After tubs my mom would cuddle and dry us in huge towels, then curl my hair with rags and I would sit on their bed with the plastic cap hairdryer (remember, like a shower cap that would blow up with hot air) watching TV. Glorious.

When joint tubs were no longer age appropriate, and parental supervision no longer welcomed, I had a different set up. The clothing hamper went next to the tub, the TV from my parents bedroom on the hamper, the TV cord stretched to the outlet next to the sink. I want to make sure you are envisioning this… a TV from 1978 (picture their size and width), balanced on a clothing hamper, next to a full tub of water, with the electric cord extended to the limit and plugged in at the sink. I was a GenX kid. It is a miracle any of us survived. Sitting in the tub, soaking in baking soda and warm water (we were never allowed bubble bath, my mom said it was bad for lady parts), enjoying Brady Bunch reruns, my body becoming wrinkled and pruned…just chilling. Bliss.

Happily, both of my college off campus apartments had claw foot tubs, and both were used often. After college my apartment in New York was in Peter Cooper Village. Peter Cooper was built after WWII for returning vets… the tubs were old style big and the water pressure in the showers was like nothing in the world, spectacular. My kids got to experience “pool” tubs like I did. They became a way to calm them, entertain them, an escape from apartment life. One of the major drawbacks of moving to the suburbs was the tiny tub in our new home. No long soaks, no relaxing after a long day, at 5 feet even I was too big. Sigh, the end of a good tub run.

After 20 years of picking hotels based on their bathtub size, I now have a soaker in my home. A deep and delicious tub. On goes the mellow music, throw in some salts and bubbles, turn off the lights, and I finally relax. Dreaming I am in a place where going outside is safe, where seeing my loved ones is normal… where I can hug my son. Swoon.

I get out of the tub, refreshed but back in this crazy new reality. FaceTime will have to do for now. Stay safe all.

Connecting in Pandemicdom

Connecting in Pandemicdom: Swoon 35

We were a game family growing up…Monopoly (the little dog, be a slumlord), Hearts (get rid of one suit, but not spades), Clue (Miss Scarlet please, diagonal back and forth and listen very carefully to what others use as their base asks), Careers (go for even hearts and stars)…you name it. My brother and I played a lot of Spit… slapping the cards (and each others hands), screaming, laughing, on the floor in front of the fire, being. Back then, my sister was a lot older than us…today we are the same age…funny how that happens. Anyway, she was not as interested in games. The ONE time she asked me if I wanted to play a game it went like this. Allision: Kat, do you want to play a card game? Me: YES!! Allison: It’s called 52 pick up. She then threw the cards all over and said, Your turn, you pick up. Sigh, older siblings.

My husband grew up in Iowa with 5 kids in his family and over 150 first cousins (yes, you read that right), they too are a game family. There is always a deck of cards on the table and a stack of board games in the corner. Reunions mean packing the games you have recently discovered to share with everyone. It is glorious to see family ages 5-85 playing together… one of my favorite sights.

Games connect people.

We play Hearts each night after dinner these days, and it is super fun, but we are missing the laughing, yelling, interaction that comes with having a big group in the living room. Some are missing take out sushi, we are missing games with friends and family.

Our son majored in Interactive Arts and Game Design in college. Like others, he is now feeling the burn of our friend COVID19. Hoping to pay rent in a timely manor, he is thinking out of the box, asking…what do people need, what do you do when you can not have parties or be in groups? As an iGen or GenZ (or what ever they will be called) he misses his people. Humans need connections. Young people are less used to being in their own heads. So, after thinking about this he created a new business. You know… global pandemic…I guess I will create a business, make a website, play test, then get it out to the masses. Swoon.

I am pleased to share his website. I hope you will copy, paste, and share too…
jacobnemec.com/hosting-games/events
Jacob can:
• Host your game night for family, friends, social groups, birthday parties, scouts, clubs.
• Be the Game Master for role-playing games (for both those who are familiar with games like DnD or newbies wanting to learn the ropes).
• All ages welcome… tell him what you are thinking and you can work it out together.

Why do you need a host… why not just play on your own?
Have you ever noticed that when you have an outsider for Thanksgiving dinner Uncle Joe behaves himself a bit? There is less fighting and everyone is at their best? That is why you need a host. Someone to arrange the meet up, someone to organize the information, someone to keep things in check. Jacob is an actor and does improv, he is entertaining, he is a storyteller. He has 12 younger cousins and has been engaging the troops since he was 5. He knows how to feel the pulse of a room and keep things going in the right direction.

Last night we got together with my brother’s family for a game night hosted by Jacob. We laughed, we yelled and we high fived the computer screen. Grandma watched a bit and got to see everyone having a blast. It. Was. So. Fun. Give it a shot. Think out of the box. Swoon.

Miss the link? https://jacobnemec.com/hosting-games/events

Acceptance

Acceptance: Swoon 34

My husband wrote a cute fb post the other day…
Greg’s legs: Hey, Greg. Greg: What’s up? Greg’s legs: A lot of joint pain down here. Greg: Oh. Greg’s lungs: And shortness of breath up here. Greg: Um… Greg’s head: Headache. Runny nose. Greg’s whole body: Fatigue! Such fatigue! Greg: Could it be… Greg’s whole body: No! You just took us on a long bike ride on a cold day after letting us atrophy for seven months. Greg: But I thought… Greg’s whole body: You thought RAGBRAI was NOT four years ago? You thought 53 and 49 were basically the same age? Dumbass. Greg’s ass: I’m fine, just a little sore, wait, what did you call me?

I took a long walk yesterday, came home with a slight headache and sore throat, a little sore in the legs… I am now thinking the symptoms were from allergies and taking a long walk, but I was nervous. I am always nervous. My poor mom coughs and I look at her, my eyes bugging out of my head… Katharine, I’m fine, it went down the wrong pipe. Greg sneezes and I look at him, my eyes bugging out of my head… Kat, people sneeze.

I need to relax. I think stress is doing more harm for me than COVID19. Relax girl.

Time to focus… work, getting together little goodies for my neighbors, checking in with my people, exercise, and turning off my COVID19 constant update. I need to continue to make dinners for the family, to play Hearts after dinner, to laugh, to play online social meet up games with my kids across the country. I need to keep attending church live on Sunday mornings, this morning we even had a coffee hour, I have never attended church in pjs before (I did have on lipstick, cause, you know, lipstick), it was delightful to see so many faces.

Friends and family are coping by doing their thing… some exercise, some create, some cook… I have two amazing friends who sew. They are making masks according to the medical guidelines. They will be donating them to hospitals, clinics, and healthcare workers. How beautiful is that. Helping. Swoon.

We can only do what we can do, I am taking all precautions for myself and for my family, so now I need to let this over stressing go. I will be what it will be, and I will accept that… at least for the next hour.

thank you Carrie Stephens Art and the counseling teacher… thank you.

Swapping Goodies

Swapping Goodies: Swoon 33

Last night Jasmine was asked if she could have a playdate with the little girls next door. They all love each other. Jasmine was my mom’s dog, then a share between me and my brother, now she is all of ours. A family dog. The girls next door also consider Jasmine their dog, because you know, why not share. Jasmine loves being everyones dog… because she loves every single person and living thing.

Sadly no playdates can happen. Dogs can carry germs on their fur and we can take no chances with bringing this virus into our home. The girls mom is a nurse in Manhattan… one of those super human people now putting their lives on the line to save others…she completely understands our need to keep a distance. So no playdate.

Last night on my way home from my last dog walk of the evening, I saw my neighbors heading into their house. In normal times there would be chatting and some Jasmine loving, no more. I scooted home to find they had just dropped off Girl Scout cookies on our back steps, just because, swoon.

This morning “Jasmine” wrote the girls a note, explaining why she couldn’t play with them for a bit. The note and some art supplies were dropped at their back door. A little back and forth between neighbors, giving what we can. I foresee a lovely time of leaving notes, crafts, and goodness for these two little beings… something to look forward to… we need to create magic.

As I write this the girls are outside playing. Jasmine is barking, I know what she wants. I put her up on the table and she watches her friends play… wishing she could join them.

Jasmine watching her friends play… social distancing is sad for dogs too.

Haigoohi

Haigoohi: Swoon 32

My grandma Haigoohi was not very judgmental… she had every right to be, but she had been through too much to judge, there was no time for that. She survived the Armenian Genocide. Once a young girl on the brink of teendom in Turkey, she went from being a well off young lady… to cleaning the homes of the people hiding her family. Her two older brothers were smuggled out of the country, landing in New Jersey, learning the language and becoming bakers. Her dad, who provided horses for the Turkish Army disappeared one night, gone. Her mom went from being a woman raising a happy family, to a woman figuring out how to keep them alive.

I keep seeing posts on social media about kids and teens who are not allowed to see their friends in person and how unfair they think it is. There is a lot of judgement out there, and I agree 100% that these kids have no choice, parents must say no, the kids must stay home. That said, I actually really feel for them. I remember being that age and itching to just go “walk around the point” with a gaggle of girls, laughing, singing, running arm in arm. It was just what we did. We spent days in each others rooms listening to albums, doing dance routines in sunrooms, watching movies on top of each other. At night we went down to the beach to hang out, cuddling up to a cute boy, watching Little Neck Bay’s shallow waves break in the moonlight, listening to 80s rock. Sitting. Talking. Together.

That is what being a teenager is about… but sadly it can not happen that way now. I thankfully do not have teenagers itching to go out. I do have young adults who would normally be going out with friends to bars, restaurants, movies, and game nights… they are not doing this anymore. Maybe having a grandparent living with us helps. Maybe stories of the things their great grandparents went through helps… maybe they are scared of me. Who knows.

We did something super fun last night. We all met up online. We chatted, we played a game, we shared pictures from the rooms we were sitting in… we connected, we laughed, and we were happy. I highly recommend connecting with the people you can not be with in person for a catch up. Show your kids (or have them show you) how to do it. They can be with their friends, they just can’t touch them. Families and adults can have a theme… ladies wine and bourbon, magic tricks, dress up, photo share, a dance party, charades. Kids and teens can do what they do… shoot nerf bullets at each others screens, play games, listen to music, just hang out.

We can all create new social norms, new ways to gather. We are not Haigoohi, hiding in a basement starving… we can do this.

Haigoohi (my grandma), Sonia, and Alice. My grandma never Americanized her name. All but my great grandpa survived. This is the picture sent to my grandpa… so he could “pick a bride”. Between my grandpa and other relatives in America, they got the whole family out. Swoon.

Way Back When

Way Back When: Swoon 31

Way way back… when things like hugs were welcomed and stores having toilet paper was taken for granted, I wrote the blurb below.

Dads and moms walking little kids to school, a huge hug before separating. Middle School kids with instruments and backpacks running to catch up with a group of friends. High Schoolers all dressed for spirit week, joyous in their outlandish outfits. Taking pictures arm in arm, spectacular.

This is the season of jackets in the morning and shorts in the afternoon. Of appreciating every warm sunny moment before the cold. The time of trying new activities like Scouts, youth group, dance, art, sports… a fresh start. The announcement of the HS play brings excitement and chatter. Panther football jerseys are the Friday fashion, and kids practice tackling each other on the lawn before being called into class.

There are tag sales and “take what you want for free” tables. The farmers market explodes with people, fresh goodness, and the annual pie eating contest. Long walks and picnics with friends at Rockwood, enjoying sunset on the Hudson. The Ragamuffin Parade and after celebration is anticipated, trick or treat walks and gatherings planned. Walking to town for dinner, eating outside, and people watching. Welcome back hugs at church after so many Sundays at the beach. Going to the JBFC for the latest movie opening. Meeting up with friends after a summer in different directions… book clubs, art openings, the new theater season at Arc Stages. No place, no person, no thing is perfect… but Pleasantville in the Fall… swoon, it comes close.

How very strange that we can no longer do any of these things. None.

Having a little friendly dog means chatting with strangers, which leads to getting tangled in the leashes of the dogs… we laugh, a bit too close for strangers to be, but you know, dogs… you just go with it. No longer. Today, every time someone walking their dog saw me, they crossed the street. If they did not cross, then I did. There are no hugs, there are no high fives, we are people just walking because there is nothing else to do. We walk, soaking up the sun, breathing the beautiful cold air… waving at each other with a well this is weird expression. We hope to make it to next Fall, we hope friends and family do the same. We hope we can get back to the times… way back when… when connections included touch.

Stay well all.